One week

…since you looked at me….ok, I don’t know a whole lot of Bare Naked Ladies, but wasn’t that a good song?

Mother’s Day.  Not good.  Oh, Spirit is by my side, and he was a total cuddlebug last night.  But my mother wasn’t my mother, and my father was my father, and no, I never did learn all the details, although personally I think it was an accident turned to a good cause.  The woman resented me.  Sometimes I’m pretty sure she outright hated me, but of course, old friends of the family deny that.  I would expect them to, though.

She died when I was 19.  No need to protect her anymore.  I understand a lot more than I did as a kid.  And for those of you who understand my Wiccan and paranormal leanings, yes, I’ve tried to make peace, or offer the olive branch, but it hasn’t happened.  It is long past time to let things go, but she still can’t.

Things that aren’t even my fault.  Story of my life, paying for shit I had nothing to do with.  I just keep trying to move forward.  To top things off, I slept all dorky and woke with a headache arising from skewing my neck.  All these years of sleeping, you’d think I’d do it right.

Plus side?  One week to Syracuse.  I admit not looking forward to the drive.  I managed to find Middletown, though, and Syracuse is bigger.  It’s very exciting, however.  I really hope I do well.  I’m not a quitter; I think I’ve proved that, but trying to find any sort of success right now feels like trying to swim my way out of quicksand.  The books did okay, and there was a spike after the last Con, but unless I’m constantly pushing, they die off.  Still, I’m very happy the characters are out there.  I never planned on making money (I wouldn’t say I’m a failure, but as with most of my life, I’m mediocre, always falling just a bit short), but I did want Azzie and Frank and Moon out there for people to enjoy.  So…goal accomplished.

Happy Mom’s Day for those who have had better experiences than me, and thanks to the ones who have shown their support!

Published by azbaelus

Local artist, author, slacker, gamer!

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